So its been awhile since ive posted on here. Super busy with work and the I phone launch. Hmmmm whats new. Well first I have switched stores. I feel like this change has rejuvenated my spirit and love of my Job. In my transitions of life this was the best choice I could make. In my personal life I am noticing a shift in me. I am feeling a lot more confident. I want to be the best me. Ive joined a gym, Im watching what I eat. I am on a ton of supplements to get my health where it needs to be. For once I am taking care of me and not anyone else. Wow what a difference a couple of months make. Dont get me wrong I, like everyone else still have struggles. I saw my aunt the other night and it put me in the foulest of moods. Some things happened to me as a child from her That I had blocked from my memory until recently. I am not sure how to confront this woman that I have maybe spoken 10 words to in almost 12 years. I did find myself wanting to lash out at this woman for anything and everything I can. She posted something on my mothers facebook that was down right mean and I would say on the verge of being cruel. I did respond back with something that was not nice at all. The nice, doormat kind of girl has left the building. Sometimes to be replaced with someone who can be a Fucking Cunt. I think with her it is because she took away some of my childhood innocence. Then there is my mother. Oh my god. I seriously want to knock some sense into that woman. Which, Unfortunately I will never be able to do. She is so manipulative it is not even funny. One of my younger sisters is going through some pretty serious things and instead of being supportive and loving to this sister. She is trying to guilt my sister into feeling bad about her choice by telling her that this decision is going to put her in the hospital. News flash woman....Smoking and eating poorly for the last 30 yrs is what is going to put you in the hospital. I love how Most adults in my family refuse to take accountability for themselves and actions. Instead they want to place blame on anyone and everyone they can. It drives me fucking bonkers....
On the dating front I went on a lovely lunch date with someone today. Very nice guy. I am really liking this whole dating thing. This really is the first time I have ever in my life just dated. I like actually getting to know someone, on a different level than what I have been able to do in the past. Hell recently Ive actually started to not use men and it makes a difference. My father left a nugget or gem so to speak with me a couple of weeks ago. When I told him my fear of actually being in a healthy relationship or dating someone I don't have to fix. He said Christy there are a ton of men out there that are nice and want to take care of you. So let them. Truere words to me have never been spoken. I am not perfect in this yet. Its baby steps. I still find myself instead of waiting for doors to be open, trying to it for myself. Oh lol. The independent one....It does feel nice to be treated like a lady and valued for my opinions and thoughts.
Well once again I am writing a novel.....Have a good night all
Chris
Chris
Dad is absolutely right.You do know he is the only one that still calls you that. I guess Samantha is the only one to call you Chrissy too,
ReplyDelete